Grateful…

18 May

Thursday night I finally made it home from my business trip. My first with my new company. I think I really like these people and I’m grateful for that. After an unexpected delay (2 hours) I finally made it home in time to miss my favorite show (SCANDAL BABY) and realize I had to drive all the way to the other side of town to pick up my son and my dog.

Almost two hours after my plane finally taxied onto the runway indicating I had finally made it back home I pulled into my garage just before midnight drained and ready to pour myself onto my inflatable mattress (I’m still furnishing my new house). The next morning as I was leaving for work I remembered to check my mail box. There was a stack of coupons and bills waiting for me that had piled up from my week away. They were all addressed to me. I cried. 

For the last few weeks I’ve been alternating between sitting on the floor, my trusty inflatable mattress and these two chairs I bought off of Craigs List a while ago. They are perfect save for the wrangled material on the seat of one of the chairs where the former owners dog turned the chair into a chew toy.  Yesterday after work I went to purchase a sofa. I had gone on my lunch break to look for one and knew immediately that it would be mine. When I went back I paid in cash. I didn’t have to finance it, get on a payment plan or put it on lay-a-way. I paid in cash, scheduled delivery and sat in my car and I sobbed. 

After I left the furniture store I went to purchase a couple of things for my bathroom. A shower curtain and some candles.  I decided to decorate my bathroom in black and white with splashes of color here and there. I found some pretty pillows for my new sofa so I put those in my cart too. As I checked out and paid for my purchase I smiled. 

Just a few short months ago I was graduating from college. I was an unemployed entrepreneur (every business owner knows what I mean). My mail was still going to my old apartment, where I lived before I moved in with my ex. Since my name was never added to the door or mailbox there  USPS would not deliver my mail unless it had his last name on it. I would never have his last name. I wonder how USPS knew? I was a guest there, that was just another reminder of  reality of the situation.

Just a few short months ago I was scrapping money together to buy a latte. I could afford to buy two lattes and eat out from one fast food restaurant each week. At least on a good week. The only savings I had consisted on the check from the jeweler who purchased back the engagement ring I was eager to be rid of. I held on to that check like it was a life raft and when I finally had to cash it in I prayed every time I had to make a purchase. “Please God, don’t forsake me”.

HE DID NOT.

Today I went for a run. In the midst of the craziness that has been my life, I’d forsaken the trail. I’d forgotten how my shins felt until they warmed up. I’d forgotten how long it took to find my pace. I had to remind myself this was a run for endurance not speed. I had all the time in the world. I forgot how it felt to have the wind pressed against my face and the sun kissing my cheeks. I’d forgotten how it felt to feel my chest burn from exhaustion while my mind willed my legs to keep moving. I’d forgotten how it felt to get to your destination and say job well done.

As I cooled down from my run I touched my face to wipe the sweat from my face and realized there were tears there too. I was no longer running from anything, I was running to it. I was no longer surviving, I was thriving. I’m no longer just alive, I’m living. My tears are no longer in sadness but in celebration.

I have my life back.

There is sunshine after the rain. To that I can certainly attest..  <3

There is sunshine after the rain. To that I can certainly attest.. ❤

Peacefully & Happily,

The Mistress of All Things Fabulous

Advertisements

4 Responses to “Grateful…”

  1. Mrs. Shah May 18, 2013 at 10:13 am #

    Amen! *and now I’m crying*

  2. Autumn skye May 18, 2013 at 11:08 am #

    Congrats on your new life journey.. Bask in those tears because you have come a long way..

  3. Renita May 18, 2013 at 11:44 pm #

    I’m so pleased for this, what you have now.

  4. Neish Ma'Jorie May 19, 2013 at 6:13 pm #

    OMG…this is just…EVERYTHING! Your blessings will continue to pour down on you for being the woman you are, so let those tears fall freely because they’re HAPPY tears ❤

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: